Monday, April 24, 2006

Meg has chicken pox :(

So sorry folks. I know that it's been an awfully long time since I last updated. I know of at least one person that has complained.

This month is simply terrible. Tons and tons of work to do, working till 10pm every night and packing in the extra hours even on Saturday and Sunday. I can barely wait for this month to be over so that I can finally take a breather.

As if things are not bad enough, Meg is down with chicken pox. I was working late as usual in the office on Tuesday when my mum called me to say that Meg has spots all over her body. Poor poor Meg. I feel so guilty for not having her the vaccinated against chicken pox. So all mothers out there, if you still haven't done so for your kids, my advice is that you have them innoculated real soon. My heart aches to see Meg all covered in spots.

But what makes it worse is that I cannot even take leave to take care of her. Understandably she's all clingy and whiney. She demands my attention but I can't offer that to her. There's just simply too much work and I still need to work late every night.

Okay that's Meg asking for me again. Gotta run......

Friday, April 07, 2006

Love language (II)

I would like to thank a reader, Angeline, who has very kindly sent me a link to a quiz about the 5 love langauges that I have published in my last post.

Here's my result, confirming that indeed my love language is words:

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Words of Affirmation
with a secondary love language being
Physical Touch.

Complete set of results

Words of Affirmation: 10
Physical Touch: 8
Quality Time: 7
Receiving Gifts: 3
Acts of Service: 2

Here's Ken's result:

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Quality Time
with a secondary love language being
Physical Touch.

Complete set of results

Quality Time: 9
Physical Touch: 8
Words of Affirmation: 5
Acts of Service: 4
Receiving Gifts: 4


Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

Take the quiz

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

The love language

Kenneth, my colleague, told me about a book he had read called 'The Love Language'. I thought that it sounds really wise and decided to share it with all of you.

He told me that everyone speaks a different language of love and that in order to make your partner feel loved. You actually have to find out what is your partner's love language and speak that language to him/her. You can love your partner to death but without the right language, you can try explaining yourself blue in the face and your partner still won't feel that love from you.

The languages are broadly classified into: Gifts, Time, Words, Touch & Acts of Service. The ones who speaks the language of Gifts, will feel most loved when you are presented with gifts. Whereas for the ones who speaks the language of Time, will feel most loved when their partner spend a lot of time with them. I am sure you get the drift by now what each one represents. Words meaning through lots of compliments and 'I love yous' (genuine ones of course). Touch...... Well simply through touch. And lastly Acts of Service, meaning doing things for the person.

Of course all of us needs a little bit of each to feel loved but there is one that's dominant and that will be the love language. I feel that it is highly important for a couple to know each other's love language because failure to push the correct button can breed discontentment. There will always be this huge expectation from you that your partner can't fulfill.

I have thought about it for a long time, trying to figure out which category I fall into. It didn't need to take long for me to eliminate 3 from the list - Gifts, Time and Acts of Service won't make me swing my vote. The tough choice was trying to decide between Words and Touch. I told Kenneth then that I chose Touch but when I sat down in private and thought about it some more, I decided that it's actually Words. Kenneth had divinely prognosticated that I am a Words person, so I guess he's right afterall.

I think that I am one that needs lots of verbal reassurance. Without it, there will be this colossal void in me - that strange aloof emptiness. You know that something is lacking but yet you can't quite put a finger on it. I mean being loved is one thing but the feeling of being loved and sayang is another.

So have you thought about it? What's your love language then?

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Humbling reply

Meg bunked at her dad's place over the weekend. So when she got back, I quizzed her on who she prefers to stay with. To which she replied "dad". My heart dropped a notch and she could see it on my face and she changed her answer to "perhaps we can just move nearer to dad".

Then me being totally insecure, quizzed her again. "Who do you like most? Mummy, daddy or dada?" I know I shouldn't be doing this but I just can't help myself. She looked at me and told me "I love all of you".
So I pressed harder and asked "but who's your favourite?". "All of you are my favourite" came her reply.
Not satisfied, I asked further. "But you must choose one!"

So next came her reply which totally shut me up. "I love all of you because all of you are family......."
I am so ashamed of myself. I am such an awful mum!

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